Thirteen Reasons I would be Terrified to Date in the 21st Century

I would like to start off by saying that I got married at a very young age. I met my husband before we graduated from high school. But we didn’t actually start dating until two weeks after school ended. I was 18 when we started dating and we were married when I was 20. I was done having kids by the time I was 23.

I will be married for 12 years come July 18^th. I cannot even fathom trying to date now. I wouldn’t even know where to start. I remember how egotistical and sure of life I was at age 18 and fresh out of school. I thought I had experienced life to its fullest, learned everything possible, and knew just how my life would fall into place. Needless to say it was a HUGE wake-up call for me.

As I think about how many different steps we have had in our marriage it makes me think of how crazy life would be like if I was a 32 year old single woman trying to date now. I would be terrified after being married for so long.

So…here is my list:

Thirteen Reasons I would be Terrified to Date in the 21^st Century:

1. The sex. I mean I have been with my husband for so long that I could not imagine going to bed with someone else.

2. My body image. I am not some slim pretty woman. I am plus size, busty, and bootylicious.

3. Dieting. My husband is comfortable with how much I eat. I remember how I used to eat the cheapest meal on the menu when I would go out on a date. It was always something Alfredo…I hate cheese! LOL.

4. Baggage. Even if I didn’t have kids because I have been “single” all this time, I would have some sort of baggage coming into a new relationship. Whether it would be kids, money, debt, etc.

5. Online dating. This in itself is another area I would not even want to fathom.

6. Clothing. My clothes are pretty laid back. I wear a lot of baggie clothes. I don’t have many “date night” clothes.

7. Finances. I have had a joint account for 14 years. I could not imagine having to pay my own everything.

8. Figuring out who is going to move in with whom. I mean if we both have houses, who would give up what.

9. Again let me talk about sex. The act itself. I mean I am so comfortable with my husband that when something works or doesn’t work, I can verbalize it. I don’t know if I could go back to pretending sex is good when it might not be.

10. Who pays? I believe the man should pay. Some women feel that they should pay half. That is their prerogative but it isn’t how I feel. But what if the man feels the same way? How do you broach the subject?

11. Asking someone out. I have never asked a man out. I wouldn’t even know how to.

12. The dreaded phone call. You know after the first date and they say they will call. The expectation and the possibility of waiting by the phone for days without a return call.

13. So I have a hang up about sex? So what? This time it is the whole “lights on, lights out” issue. I would want lights out because…hello this is some new person I am taking to bed. But what if he wants lights on? Do I just smile and pretend I am comfortable with that?

So what do you think? Are you dating in today’s world? If you are, what are some of your fears? If you aren’t, could you image it? What would make you terrified? Or am I just a scaredy-cat? LOL.

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